The One Night Stand

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It’s time to put this experience into perspective

One night stand, three words that have the ability to provoke intense feelings of bias and guilt. Yet, on the flip side of the coin, a one-night stand may also become a source of freedom, release and growth. It’s time to drown out the noise perpetuated by society, family and friends. How do you feel about having a one-night stand? Let’s break it down, shall we? The following example may shed some light on the infamous deed.

You are out with your friends. All you care about is having a good time: jokes, laughter, dinner and perhaps some dancing. Your night shifts gears. You notice him while dancing. He responds with a smile and a slight nod of his head. His group eyes your group. Your packs become acquainted. Something stirs inside you. You spend most of the night chatting. A decision is made to head out to another venue. The night is taken up a notch with more dancing, in-depth conversations and another drink or two.

When you wake up, it takes a moment to realize that you are not home. You slowly turn your head and see him. The fog clears and you remember… you remember it all: the clubs, the dance moves, his favourite band, laughter and the after party at his place, before you have time to control it snippets of clothes being stripped away, kissing, the multiple positions all flash through your mind. You feel… well, right now you are not sure how you feel, but you are positive of one thing: you need to get out of there.

Your best attempt at sneaking out of bed ninja style results in him waking up immediately, followed by awkward hellos, getting dressed in the bathroom, exchanging numbers, calling a cab and a quick kiss goodbye. Once home, you shower, make a cup of tea and reflect. What the hell did you just do? You’re not the kind of person who has sex with a stranger. You don’t do one-night stands. Guess what buttercup, you just did.

Before you judge yourself too harshly, it’s time to put this experience into perspective.

  1. Are you normally a smart, rational and sane person? Check.

Check. Check.

  1. Did your “spidey-sense” go off at anytime last night? Nope.
  2. Were you into him? Yes.
  3. Was he into you? Yes.
  4. Did you have a rocking good time in bed? Hell yes.
  5. Did you practice safe sex? Check.
  6. For that brief moment in time did you let loose and set free your inhibitions? Absolutely.

With this knowledge, banish any guilt or shame. Regardless if this becomes a singular experience or your new favourite past time, your number one priority is to stay safe. The next time you hear the words, one-night stand, challenge yourself to think differently and loose the baggage of judgment.

Rebecca Cooper Traynor

Rebecca is one of Toronto's Top Matchmakers, and has recently expanded her business to singles across Canada. Match Me Canada is a service that works with busy career professionals who see the value in working with a professional matchmaking service and she has built relationships with over 19 matchmaking agencies in North America. |

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